Monday, 27 January 2014

Female Empowerment : Latest Thoughts

Just a short post, on some things that have been playing on my mind as of late, in regards to women and their attitudes towards other women. Obviously being a woman myself, I can confidently say that I have been on both sides of the table: 1. Been hated on for no legitimate reason 2. Hated on others females out of envy etc. As I grow into a better person everyday, I have come to realise the imaginary competition females have amongst each other is all BS. With times getting tougher in all aspects, I can't think of anything more comforting than having my 'sisters' to turn to, with no judgement placed.

Women also have an "unfair" hand dealt as far as their place in society. We continue to earn less than men, face sexual harassment and domestic violence at a rate incredibly higher than men, have our sexuality shamed and our bodies put on display for evaluation (see- every fashion/pop culture magazine). We are victims of our culture and society and yet we often target other women for making us feel this way instead of targeting who is really to blame. We should not need validation from men or mass media. Supporting other women springs from realizing that we all face common struggles and not competing like "they" want us to.

Referring back to a video by my favourite spiritual mentor, Iyanla Vanzant, here is my take on the 5 main reasons for female betrayal/hatred.

1. Self Hatred: Picking the things you hate in yourself, and diverting that attention to a flaw in another female.

2. Seek External Validation: We look to other people to make us feel good all round and when we don't get it, the bitchiness comes out. Sometimes, it's not always people we seek. Social media has recently come to play a big part in ones confidence, based on how many likes you get on a picture (obviously not the case with all females).

3. Honour your true self: Simply, be true to who you are. Don't get caught up in trying to keep up with the latest as this will undoubtedly shadow the potential you have.

4. Role models: We mimic what we see. Therefore, the attitudes of key females in our lives (mums, sisters,etc) play a massive role in moulding our own attitudes towards certain things.

5. Unrealistic Expectations: We tend to focus on how others will help us/what they will do for us, forgetting the true value.

All in all, females should not feel threatened by other females' success, and rather embrace and lift them up. 'The way to achieve your own success, is to be willing to help someone else get it first.' 

Here's a link to Oprah's first-ever Power List of females doing amazing things for those interested!

-Posted by Vanessa 

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